Laughter in life.

 1, the soldiers asked the company commander: stepping on a mine during combat supposed to? Commander very angry: *, to country? Worn away according to the compensation price.
2, for a long time the information I received your ink very distressed I think of death had been cut with a potato clock hit too far with the tofu with noodles with a parachute on the floor, had to skip hanging dead as you can have Mexican meal Chengsi I please I forget.
3, cool if you feel my heart dig dig cool, call me my phone! talk about feelings, please press 1, press 2 about work, talk about life, please press 3, to I introduced the object, press 5, I eat, please say so, and find I borrow money, please hang up.
4, monkeys, giraffes married, filed for divorce after one year giraffe: I'll never have that day jumping up and down it! monkeys furious: to leave off! you ever seen a mouth had to climb trees pro!
5, Fish said: looked at the mist-shrouded peaks that can not help but sing: Yeah Rights cable, this is the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau !~~~~< br> 7, you have grown up, some things you should know: the day, is used to wind and rain; land, is used to take a long long grass; I, is used to prove that human beings are more than great; you are used to stew vermicelli.
8, but no band in the railway next to the large paper, do not worry, the train will remind you: pants rub pants rub pants rub! in the river with no one on large paper, do not worry, the frog will tell you: stick scratch, scratch stick, stick stick scratch !
9, but money can not buy a house buy a house, can buy the marriage but can not buy love, you can buy watches and clocks, but can not buy time, money is not everything, but is a source of pain, put your money me, leave me to bear the pain it!
10, God, too blue! the sea, salty! life, too hard! work,UGGs, too tired! and you, and by chance! miss you, insomnia! see you, too far! Oh, how I can do this? think you want to get I could not eat chopsticks, bowls swallow!
11, give you 12 Lunar New Year, I wish you a smart as a mouse, strong as a bull, brave as the tiger, cute, such as rabbit, self-confidence as a dragon, like a snake charming, romantic, such as horses, tame as sheep, naughty, such as monkeys, as beautiful as chicken, loyal as a dog, looks like a pig!
12, accidentally stepped on a gibbon chimpanzee pulling the stool, gibbon gentle help of their carefully cleaned after they fall in love, people ask how they come together? chimpanzees sighed: ape dung! are simian dung ah!
13, the lion and the bear were in the tree next to the stool, a month later, the Lions found themselves stool next to the trees grow thick tree than the bear, then said something full of vicissitudes of the philosophical mm lion feces than bear it!
14, a figure thought by It added 52.8, multiplied by 5, then by area 3.9343, divided by 0.5, and finally thought minus the number of times that the answer is very romantic Oh!
15, you put the old ring in the office fart, my colleagues could not help but say you can not but speak out. and then they see you sit there and shake to and fro shook, ask what you are doing, you answer that I tune into the vibration of the!
16, Dear God, please bless those who do not call me, do not pass me a note, not to miss my friends: May the Lord fell into the toilet to go to their mobile phones it, Amen!
17, said you can be ruthless, lying in the theater account for four seats across, people call you up, you only twice fixed place hum, the security came and said: Friend cruel, Which Road to the? you bite, said: F on the aisle fell off!
18, you think you think you read, you find a painter to paint, put your stick in the cup, drink all day watching you mm happiness? you a cup of boiling water being burnt to death !
19, Dear users, this time we deduct from your calls 20 per dedicated to the cause of the Palestinian national liberation, for all the Palestinian autonomous government decided to give you the name of the Arab world, the lofty title: This. sand Le Baji!
20, knowledge of the United States, is make a loss; the beauty of poetry is to incite men and women derailment; women of the United States, is so stupid that no regrets; men of the United States, is lying right damn day. < br> 21, I only care about care about you care about is whether I care about you care about me, I care about you and care about you I care I care about care about you like you care about me, small for gestational age, to see halo you!
22, heard of it? Review past life five hundred times, only in exchange for a life rub shoulders, as close friends like you and me, last generation do not seem to light his mother turning back!
23, There are two counterfeiting of currency denomination of 15 yuan accidentally create the counterfeit money, they decided to get the remote mountainous areas to spend, when they get a 15 yuan 1 yuan to buy the candied fruit, they cried, farmers find their two 7's
24, your life portrayal: Pig-year-old learn to bathe mm self-cleaning; twenty years old when Mao shiny mm pig; three-year-old pig to find a job career mm; four-year-old employee of the commission mm pig who may commission; five-year-old learned to play basketball mm pig vote!
25, a year-old boy took a year-old girl's hand and said: ; you can do for my future responsible? ? I and they had a falling out, and almost beat them, because some of them say that you monkeys, apes and some that you like, just too much! did not see you as a pig!
27, there One day, I tell you you are a pig, you say: I am a pig, just. So I started to call you pig strange. Then one day you could not help but loudly announced in front of everybody: I am not a pig strange!
28, the most popular during the war in Iraq three words: peace peace, war, war. that found, to link these three English words read aloud three times, you'll usher in a great historical mystery. (I put fart )...< br> 29, people will fall in love, not special; cows will eat grass, not special; pigs by telephone, before special; also press! truly God pig! wow cow! will laugh! really cool spent pig!
30, there are two words always wanted to say to you today, the courage at last: the first one, I love you I love you; the second sentence of the first sentence do not really
31, Psychological Testing:
IQ pricey self that felt pretty down at humor down by quite attractive feel that he still looks down at quite handsome, down by test results: pretty shameless The
32, in the vicissitudes of your brow I see in your eyes I see the confidence in your forehead I see the years, I see in your Chunchi Jian leeks, go and brush your teeth! < br> 33, eat shit, bamboo mat held, Bu Xi, straminea 绱, Huang gather in harvest, monsters Zhan, hurried swine, Wo plutonium, shad tunnel, above a few words you know, is not found himself does nothing except eat shit it will be out?
34, two cows were grazing. which one said; ; have been crazy!
35, I have been in the unknown warrior arena, until one day the most mysterious legends met you, even called out your name, since then, I also have ringing lakes name: narrow-known pig!
36, marriage: one-meter house ugly poor rural primary school education account Sijiu shack three Susukida acre pot of cold hot stove is not his wife, text messages throughout the year drug chain-wide levy girlfriend today not willing to join hands with the revolutionary road?
37, doctor: in my armpits in the up? But I do not do God has for a long time, can only use SMS bless you: happy day!
39, if the world's pigs have died? (play a song) Answer: at least you
40 , sat during the Qing court, the Northern Army carry a gun, Wuchang city waste drop off, too busy to help the Northern Expedition, Nanchang external suffered injuries, the Long March climbed over the wall, behind enemy lines, steal sheep war, and who better than me Strong?
41, the warlord had said the king, Pa Pingjin battle over housing, across the Yangtze River drink soup, the Yalu River fed the wolf, the bombardment of Kinmen grazed the chamber, returned fire in self-defense scolded mother, swept the reform and opening up yellow, but also Who better than I mad?
42, a student, history lesson of the whole points are recorded in the cuff of the. you? Neurology, said: Fool, A side B side songs over and over, of course!
44, nHZ! HS OM to know that you could not guess, can not read, you take a closer look ah! can not see it? you know pinyin? You have to have a limit stupid, right? the phone upside down!
45, his father: : lover: h
47, a drunken man accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by crowd, a policeman came: What happened? drunk: do not know, I also just arrived.
48, a man to jump, his wife shouted: Dear Do not impulse, our long way to go! men hear, and whipped and jumped down. Police said: You really should not have threatened him!
49, was executed prisoners executed, the poor quality of the bullets, fired the first shot did not go off, then opened the second shot and third shot ... this time ... prisoners tears, holding the bailiff of the thigh, said: Brother you strangle me to! too fucking scary .....< br> 50, three cute little tadpole tadpole to a restaurant, just sit to see the waiter to the next table a dish of stir-fried bullfrog. Three little tadpole tadpole hand in hand, the tears began to sing: